When Cat Care is Hard

Some people don’t understand how challenging taking care of your cats at certain times really is. There are many cat videos showcasing the cuteness of these furry family members, their quirks are just so endearing, and they are an endless source of pleasure and entertainment, yet.. There is very little shared about the hardships of this journey we undergo together when we choose to share our lives with kitties.

Life gets busy, and you don’t always have the emotional and physical capacity to allocate the extra care and resources your cats need when they are not well. By “not well” I mean showing signs of discomfort both with their behaviour or with less than perfect health.

I want you to know that I GET IT. You are seen, heard, and understood. So.. If you have ever felt guilty because it was all too much at some point, I hear you.

Taking care of your cats sometimes is a breeze, and we all love the benefits of having cats in our lives. Sometimes though, life gets busier, more stressful, and more complicated... Sometimes it just happens, it is not because we made bad choices... And when you are facing a behaviour issue or a health challenge with your cats, it can get to be too much to deal with. Now, this doesn’t mean that we just forfeit our duties as cat guardians, we still have a duty of care and also a loving disposition toward our kitties, because we love them. But it does mean that we feel the burden of things, financially, emotionally, and physically. 

Take, for example, the stories shared by fellow cat parents on social media. I have just read 3 posts on Facebook this morning where these individuals found themselves at their wit's end when their cats needed them the most:

"I found myself in a whirlwind of chaos recently. With extra hours at work, a boss who is refusing any shift changes, and the pressure to maintain my salary, quitting wasn't an option. On top of that, I was struggling with a personal health issue, and tensions with my housemate were at an all-time high, turning my home into something like a warzone. Just when I thought things couldn't get any worse, my cat fell ill. His non-stop howling is a reminder of my inability to provide the care he needed. I was distraught so I gave him Gabapentin, hoping he'd be okay by the time I got back from work."

"I  feel like I've been through the wringer. Just when I thought everything was gonna be okay, my cat's pancreatitis flared up again. Months of meds and vet visits drained my bank account, but my fur baby still isn't doing well. To top it off, my kids are causing trouble at school, and my husband is fighting to keep his job. It's like one thing after another... Seeing my cat in pain breaks my heart, and I'm at a loss for what to do. I'm hanging by a thread and having anxiety attacks every single day..." 

"Okay, so let me tell you something about my cat. She's on a peeing spree, and not in the litter box—oh no, on our pillows, couch, and even my lap sometimes. Can you imagine the smell? It was driving me and my husband up the wall, and my poor marriage is taking a hit because of it. To top it all off, I'm dealing with in-law drama, a massive work project, and the loss of a close friend. Talk about a rough patch! I'm torn between handling all this chaos and figuring out how to help my stressed-out kitty. It's like walking on eggshells, I don't know what to do!"

In times of crisis, it's essential to seek support and devise practical solutions tailored to your unique circumstances. That's where resources like The Holistic Cat Care JUMPSTART can make a difference. Unlike overwhelming information dumps, this programme focuses on providing actionable strategies and personalized guidance to help cat parents navigate challenging situations with confidence. 

3 tips to instantly uplevel cat care:

1. Release Guilt

Guilt is a natural emotion, but when it becomes excessive, it can hinder our ability to provide effective care for our cats. By understanding the harmful impacts of guilt and practicing self-forgiveness, we can break free from its grip and approach cat care with clarity and compassion. Guilt is useful for guiding moral behaviour and keeping social harmony (without guilt we would all be a herd of psychopaths), but it can become damaging when it's excessive or not directed appropriately. Understanding why guilt can be harmful is an important step, especially when you are trying to lead a balanced and compassionate approach to life, including the nurturing care of your cats. There are many reasons why guilt can be a damaging emotion:

• It impacts Mental Health

Guilt can lead to anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. It can make you feel unworthy and unable to offer value and contributions to others, including your cats who need your care.

• It hinders Personal Growth

When people are overwhelmed by guilt, they may become stuck in a cycle of self-criticism and rumination, focusing on past mistakes rather than future growth, and this can prevent them from learning from their experiences and moving forward positively.

• It strains Relationships

Guilt can lead to overcompensating behaviours, resentment, and lack of communication. People burdened with guilt usually withdraw from others, which diminishes the quality of their relationships, including the relationships with their cats.

• It leads to Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms

In an effort to alleviate feelings of guilt, individuals might resort to substance abuse, overeating, or self-punishment. These behaviuors can have long-term negative effects on both physical and emotional well-being, making things worse in the long term.

• It distorts Decision-Making

Guilt can cloud judgment. Decisions made out of guilt are often not in your best interest or the interest of others, including your cats, as they might be based on a desire to alleviate that guilt rather than on rational or compassionate considerations.

• It reduces the Enjoyment of Life

Persistent guilt can sap the joy out of life, making it difficult to enjoy simple pleasures, celebrate successes, or feel grateful for what you have. If one thing can help you during tough times, it is being present, living in the moment, and trying to avoid dwelling on the past or worrying constantly about the future.

• It can inhibit Forgiveness (and we go full circle here)

Guilt affects both self-forgiveness and the forgiveness of others because it can lock you into a cycle of self-blame that makes it hard to move past mistakes. To forgive yourself or to accept forgiveness from others, and forgiving yourself for not being on top of your game at a difficult time is important.

2. Embrace Resilience: 

The second thing I want to say is... Remember that tough times don’t last, tough people do. Life is really hard sometimes, but think of the hard times you have experienced before.. And I bet you can find gifts arising from those horrible times. Things you learned. Things you overcame. Being resilient when life is slapping a fish on your face is challenging. I’m not discounting that for a minute. Sometimes you are just SO TIRED with all that is going on. But... If your cat is unwell, and extra care is needed, try and find an ally to help you put a routine and a plan in place, so that you don’t have to stress about it, and scramble through conflicting advice and information that is just likely to overwhelm you. I am here to help, and if not me, choose a professional who can listen to you and lighten the burden for you, because you need support in difficult times, so you can make it through, and help your cat in the process.

3. Focus on Wins: 

Finally, focus on your wins. Seriously: stack ANYTHING that is an achievement, even a small one, in your success pile. Focus on taking one step at a time, because the only way you are going to climb a mountain is little by little, focusing on what’s in front of you. You can’t pour from an empty cup of course, so make sure you take enough care of yourself, select your non-negotiables wisely, and honour your priorities.

Now, if you already know that support is what you want, you can come on board The Holistic Cat Care JUMPSTART today. We can onboard new cat parents every day because The Jumpstart is there to help you through a crisis, or just after a crisis for easy, optimal maintenance, so it would not make sense for me to have you wait months until I decide to open this programme again, because if you need it right now, right now you should have it.

Inside The Holistic Cat Care JUMPSTART, I direct cat parents to go through a particular module first, to quickly address the thing they need the most, and then we have calls. You want to make your cats feel better, without constantly running to the vet, when it is possible, because that hurts your wallet, and again, it also adds stress to the whole situation. So the calls are really important because that’s where we can tailor a plan TO YOU, to your specific circumstances, and make sure that the plan that we draft, is feasible so that it can support you at a time of need.

If you are not sure yet but you are curious if this could be the solution you are looking for, then we can have a chat. I am a real person, and I am happy to assist you. You have the option of applying for a FREE call. The CATalyst CALL is something I offer to anyone who fills up the short application linked below and qualifies. So if you want to have a chat, get some clarity about what to do next, and see if this container is potentially what can serve you best at this time.

..And I just want to leave you with this: YOU CAN PLAY AN ACTIVE PART IN YOUR CAT’S HEALTH. When things seem like they are spinning out of control, you can take some of that control back into your hands. You don’t have to take the options you are initially given if you don’t like any of them: in most cases, there are more things you can do. Be proactive, be resilient, and when life is messy, take a big breath, look for support so you don’t have to do everything alone, and try and focus on the positive stuff, because one step at a time, you will move through the sticky situation you find yourself in while supporting your cats too.

You are an amazing cat parent, just for being here and wanting to still take care of your cats at your best even at times of strain. Don’t lose hope, trust yourself, and reach out if you need a different perspective.